All about perspectives I guess...

I clearly remember the nurses wheeling Nathan out of the OR and seeing his incisions for the first time. It was hard to take. But, I quickly got used to it - to the point where it would almost offend me when I'd see people doing a double-take at him when they'd catch a glimpse of his scars. Granted, he had no bandages on it and there was tape residue around it as well as stains on his surrounding skin from the antiseptic they washed him with. So, yeah, I guess I can see where people would look twice. Still bothered me though.

Well, we're 2 months post-op. I think his incisions are healing very nicely. I don't like how the loops stick out on his neck though. The wires from the device are attached at his neck and to prevent them from pulling too tightly in the event he were to ever have a grand mal, they loop the wires. Ok, I get that. But, the way they stick out just calls attention to an area that is already obvious. I hope as he grows his neck thickens out so that those loops are less evident. Kids can be cruel.

I debated posting this pic... for quite a while actually. This "journal" is more for my sanity and so that I don't unload on my friends all day long. I've never been the jouraling type of person but I type much faster than I write, so this seems to work for me. And, not only is this a place for me to vent, it's also a way for me to chronicle this fight. To remind me of where we've been and hopefully how far we've come. By the grace of God, I will re-read in a year what I've written this month and we'll be light years ahead. In a years time, his scars might be barely visible. Or maybe just not visible to me anymore. And, I'm proud of Nathan and how much he's endured, how much of a fighter he is. I pray we find our way out of here. Can you imagine the compassionate and sensitive man he's going to be when he grows up?